THE DAY I TRIED BUDGETING WITH TIKTOK ADVICE — A FINANCIAL COMEDY STORY
THE DAY I TRIED BUDGETING WITH TIKTOK ADVICE — A FINANCIAL COMEDY STORY
Budgeting is one of those adulting skills people brag about on social media. You know, the kind of skill where you think, “Yes, I can control my money and achieve financial freedom,” and then reality laughs at you while your bank balance cries silently in the corner.
I had seen TikTok videos promising financial enlightenment. “Budgeting hacks that will make you rich in 30 days,” said a guy holding an avocado toast like it was a magic wand. Naturally, I thought, This is my path to financial glory.
Little did I know, TikTok budgeting advice is like following a GPS that occasionally throws you into a lake.
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. My day started innocently. I woke up, stretched like a CEO ready to conquer the stock market, and opened my bank app. I stared at my account balance: $43.78. Not quite the capital needed for a diversified investment portfolio, but definitely enough to make a few TikTok “financially savvy” choices.
The first TikTok tip was simple: track every penny. Sounds reasonable, right? Wrong.
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I began by writing down every expense. Coffee: $3.50. Headphones from last week: $27.49. Random online course on “Advanced Cryptocurrency Arbitrage”: $12.99. I realized quickly that tracking my spending was like auditing a crime scene—except I was both the criminal and the investigator.
The TikTok guru said, “Use spreadsheets! It’s how billionaires budget.” So I made a spreadsheet. A very detailed spreadsheet. It had formulas, macros, color codes, conditional formatting… basically enough data to launch a hedge fund for squirrels.
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Next, TikTok insisted: set strict spending categories. Groceries, entertainment, subscriptions, spontaneous online purchases (apparently this counts as a category).
I tried this. Day one went well. Day two, I accidentally spent my “entertainment budget” on a lifetime supply of digital stickers for messaging apps. Apparently, I misunderstood “entertainment” as “things that make me laugh while crying over my financial decisions.”
By day three, my budget was a mess. My “savings” category had been raided by “unexpected emergencies,” which was really just me ordering a $9.99 luxury candle because the tutorial said ambiance improves productivity.
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Then TikTok said, “Automate your savings! Transfer 20% of your income to a savings account.”
I laughed. My income was $43.78. 20% is $8.75. I transferred it anyway because, you know, commitment. Eight dollars and seventy-five cents later, I felt like Warren Buffett. My portfolio of dreams was off to a solid start.
By the end of the day, I had $35.03 to cover lunch, gas, and emotional healing.
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The next tip was meal prepping to save money. TikTok showed a guy making perfectly portioned quinoa bowls and grilled chicken.
I tried. I bought quinoa. I bought chicken. I even bought kale, which I can now confidently say tastes like sadness in leafy form.
By the time I finished cooking, I realized my prepped meals were worth $60. I had spent $60 to eat $12 worth of nutrients. Financially, this is called a loss disguised as adulting.
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TikTok said to track subscriptions. I counted mine: Netflix, Spotify, a “premium astrology app” (for spiritual financial insight), a meditation app, a workout app, a virtual pet app…
I canceled some. I felt victorious. Then I remembered the TikTok tip about “investing your savings in high-yield accounts.” I opened a brokerage app, saw I had $8.75 in my savings account, and thought, Perfect, let’s buy Tesla stock.
I bought two shares of a penny stock instead. By the end of the day, they dropped 12%. My financial journey had officially become a comedy of errors.
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The TikTok strategy also included “challenge yourself with no-spend days.”
I tried this for one day. Disaster.
I went to the grocery store because I was out of milk. I didn’t buy milk. I walked around the store like a monk, contemplating life. I left with three bags of snacks I didn’t need. Financially, this is called “spiritual enlightenment leading to bankruptcy.”
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Then came the most ambitious tip: “Create a financial vision board!”
I cut out images from magazines: Lamborghinis, beach houses, a yacht, Bitcoin logos, stock charts with upward trends… I arranged them meticulously on a poster board.
It looked beautiful. Inspiring. Then I realized: I had spent $25 on glue sticks, scissors, and glitter. My “vision of financial freedom” had cost me more than my net worth.
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TikTok then advised “invest in yourself”.
So, naturally, I enrolled in an online course titled: “Mastering the Financial Markets While Drinking Herbal Tea.”
It promised life-changing insights and guaranteed to turn beginners into Wall Street legends.
Three hours and $49.99 later, I could confidently say I had learned… absolutely nothing practical. But I did acquire a deep sense of self-confidence, which is priceless… until your bank account says otherwise.
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Next, TikTok said, “use cash envelopes to control spending.”
I tried. I labeled envelopes: groceries, transportation, coffee, random online splurges. I put $10 in each envelope. Then I went to a café. Paid for coffee. Realized I spent $11.75 because I added an unnecessary extra shot of espresso.
I now have a permanent caffeine-induced debt of $1.75. It’s like a student loan, but more bitter.
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TikTok said, “review your expenses daily.”
I did. Every day, I cried a little more. My coffee addiction accounted for 20% of my budget. Streaming services were 15%. Impulse purchases… 50%. By the fifth day, my bank app had a popup: “Please stop spending, or we will deactivate your account.”
It’s funny how financial literacy can make you laugh… and then immediately cry into your avocado toast.
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The TikTok advice also included “set short-term and long-term financial goals.”
I set a short-term goal: stop spending all my money on snacks.
I set a long-term goal: retire by 60 with a modest yacht.
By noon, I had already failed the short-term goal by buying chocolate. By the end of the week, I realized the yacht was never happening. My retirement plan had become a meme.
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TikTok warned: “avoid financial peer pressure.”
I thought I was doing great. Then my friend posted his new investment in a tech startup. Suddenly, my budget felt inadequate. I impulsively invested in another startup. It failed in three hours. My bank app displayed a sad emoji. I cried.
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By the end of the month, my TikTok budgeting adventure had achieved one thing: I now fully understood why adults complain about money.
I had:
Spent more than I earned.
Invested poorly.
Accidentally created a fan club for a penny stock.
Learned that financial TikTok advice is hilarious, but sometimes lethal.
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I had one last TikTok tip: “celebrate small wins!”
So, I celebrated by… buying ice cream. Financially, this is called “the sweet taste of failure.”
And there I was, sitting with my ice cream, spreadsheet open, bank account crying silently, realizing I had learned a valuable lesson: budgeting is hard, TikTok is funny, and the stock market is terrifyingly real.
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Moral of the story:
TikTok can inspire, but your bank account doesn’t care about inspiration. It cares about numbers, decimals, interest rates, and, occasionally, your tears.
Budgeting is serious business. TikTok budgeting is comedy gold. If you ever see a video promising financial miracles, remember me: I am living proof that “viral financial advice” can be extremely entertaining… and slightly traumatizing.
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By the end of this journey, I had spent exactly $124.37 trying to follow TikTok’s advice. My savings had decreased by 8.2%. My emotional intelligence increased by… well, slightly. And I had a story over 2,000 words long that proves: financial comedy exists, and it can be monetized.
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